Introducing "Tales of the Fighting Ferrets"

My name is Jim Johnson and I’ll be your guide through a story that I hope you feel is funny, interesting, at times moving, but most importantly something you find entertaining.

This is the tale of an average man who finds himself in a very unusual situation. His career as a college athletics administrator appears to be ruined, his family leaves him, and he has only one viable option to try and rebuild his life.

It is at Farnsworth University in rural Maryland that Conrad Kondratowicz finds a group of people he thinks belong on The Island of Misfit Toys. He feels that he is surrounded by knuckleheads and nitwits along with a few people who are just plain strange. Despite this, he is desperate enough to salvage his career and sense of self-worth that he plows forward trying to pull together Farnsworth’s pitiful Division III athletic department.

Along the way, Conrad begins to wonder if his life was actually ruined after all. As he gets to know the eclectic gathering of people he works with, he sees past the dysfunction and quirks some of them have and finds sincere, hard-working, even loving individuals.

It’s a good thing too, because Farnsworth athletics is always in a state of crisis. You’ll see Conrad deal with explosions, sabotage, general incompetence, and a history of failure by the school’s varsity teams. Even the most basic things, like having his hamburgers prepared correctly, become daunting challenges for our hero.

Then there’s Freddie Ferret, the school mascot. Freddie goes beyond that role, acting more as the goodwill ambassador for a school that sorely needs one. He’s got his own issues that Conrad will get to see up close and personal.

I am very happy that out of all the journalists he could have selected to tell this story, Conrad chose me. I will go behind the scenes of his life and the inner-workings of the Farnsworth athletic department. You, the reader, deserve to know what really goes on there.

Then again, perhaps I’ll just make it all up.

Either way, I hope you will enjoy “Tales of the Fighting Ferrets.” Beginning with Chapter 5, there will be a new chapter posted every Tuesday.

Tell your friends, tell your family and let me know what you think of this story by posting a comment or sending e-mail to thecourtmaster@aol.com.

Remember, Fear the Ferret!